- offshore worker
- socially inept
You've read how much I like roughnecks. I do. I love a hard working man. Bring on the work boots and calloused hands, please and thank you. However, I don't necessarily want to date someone who works offshore, mainly because of their schedules. I realize that works for some people, but I am not one of those people.
I will not defend ugliness or social retardation.
Occasionally, I stumble upon a profile that has only one picture to represent the candidate...one picture with several people in it. That's not fair. Which one are you???
So I'm flipping through profiles, flirting like crazy, trying to make something happen. Now comes the agonizing wait for response. Sometimes you get a "No Thanks" e-mail; sometimes you get nothing. I prefer nothing to a no thank you. I don't understand the people who don't respond in any way. I can see that you've been online and you know I'm interested. There's no way that you're out of my league, right? I've (facebook equivalent of) poked 33 people. I've gotten 6 "No Thank You" e-mails. What about the rest of you fellas? Am I gonna have to get ballsy and write e-mails? This blows.
The pressure of the pre-date e-mailing is disgusting. You ask logistical questions and get logistical answers. Snore. Once you get past all that boring stuff, you may begin to cultivate a fondness for one another based solely on a little shallow, electronic flirting. Seems harmless enough. When you write an e-mail, you can take your time. You can rearrange your sentences (over and over), double check your grammar (if you know how) and correct your spelling (if you're keen enough to realize you've spelled things incorrectly).
*Side note for all you novice-computer-users who want to date me: Spell check will work in your favor. keds ≠ kids. thim ≠ them. ezey ≠ easy. spind ≠ spend. Et cetera and so forth. You may be a very hard working, upstanding gentleman of a fella, but it's really difficult to get past these glaring mistakes. Please try to clean things up a bit.
E-mailing also affords the opportunity to spare yourself any embarrassment caused by over-exposure (that is, talking too much). You can't do that in regular conversation. Sometimes after I speak, the ridiculous nonsense that comes out of my mouth seems to float in front of my face for a few agonizing seconds and then crack like an egg over my head. It's nice to avoid that feeling.